Tre and I met in the sixth grade, he would make a joke about my hair every.single.day. in class. Who would have thought our story would begin like this?
Fast-forward to the eighth-grade, after a slight glow-up, and now he “likes” me, asks me to 8th-grade prom, and that was the true beginning to our love story…or so I thought.
Literally a few weeks after he asked me to prom, my mother told me we would be moving from Maryland to Mississippi before I started high school. What?! What about my friends, the life I was building here, everything I’ve ever known. What about the guy that I just started ‘falling’ for?
I put ‘falling’ in quotations because…do you even know if you’re truly falling for someone at 14 years old? That’s debatable. But anyway, I was devastated, he was devastated. But as hard as I tried, there was no convincing my mother that staying in Maryland was the best choice for me.
I stayed in Mississippi up until I graduated from college in 2016, and moved back to Maryland to be closer to family. During the nine years of being separated, Tre and I remained really good friends. We didn’t try to force a relationship, we actually both dated other people, but always maintained a friendship.
April 2016, we spoke on the phone after losing connection for over a year. We talked for hours, but the best part of the conversation involved talking about what God was doing in our lives. It was almost as if the moment we spoke the Lord’s name, love awakened in us. We connected on a deeper level that night, the spirit of God was all over us during that conversation…I will never forget it!
Although I could go on and on about just how amazing my man is and how precious our love story has become, that is not the purpose of this post! I want to stress to you all how important it is to keep your eyes on God instead of searching for a husband.
You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face Lord, do I seek.”
HERE ARE THREE THINGS I NEEDED TO UNDERSTAND BEFORE GOD COULD SEND MY HUSBAND:
God desires ALL OF US
Being a wife comes with great responsibility. God will not entrust you with a husband unless he knows you will not idolize him, He needs to know that you will not place the love you have for your husband over the love you have for Him, your Creator. Read 1 Corinthians 7: 32-35. Here Paul explains the challenge of balancing duties unto your spouse and God. When you are single, you have more time and resources to devote to serving the Lord. You can start that blog he’s been calling you to start, you can participate in that homeless food drive, you can go to that young adult seminar… you can do more things that will draw you nearer to God!
However, once you are married, you have two divine responsibilities: to please both your husband and God. There must be order! God must always come first, your husband and family come second only to Him. This is a HUGE responsibility, loves! God will not entrust you with a husband if you will become too consumed with him and distance yourself from your Creator.
When I get married, I plan to make it a point to sit at God’s feet, ALONE, every single day. Worshipping and praying together are also very important, but in order to maintain a deep connection with our Source, we must plug-in individually and privately.
Stay busy in singleness
Ever heard the story of Ruth and how she was busy working when her husband, a KING, noticed and desired her? Yes, she worked! She wasn’t searching for a man, she wasn’t stalking somebody on Instagram…she wasn’t trying to show off her body to get him to notice her. She chose to be obedient to God in her singleness. As a result, she was found by a man of God who would love and cherish her dearly.
I was busy before my fiancé. I was focused on finishing up my degree and growing in my relationship with God to even think about a man. I was content in my singleness because I knew that God knew the desires of my heart. He knew I’ve always wanted a husband and family. I rested in knowing that only God will know when I was ready, and I TRUSTED Him and his perfect timing! At that time, I didn’t care if God took 10+ years to send my husband! I rested, my heart was already full in Him.
Check your heart
Do you fantasize about the idea of marriage so much that it’s become an idol? God desires our time, our worship, our devotion. He gets jealous when we desire anything else more than Him (Exodus 34:14). Ask the Lord to reveal to you the contents of your heart. He will show you what you are placing before Him, if anything. Spend time at His feet, you’d be surprised at how He will transform your life and prepares you for your purpose!
You must worship no other gods, for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you.
Exodus 34:14 NLT
Focus on PURPOSE
Who you’re married to is not nearly as important to God as your divine purpose. You’ve been called by God, otherwise you wouldn’t be seeking Him, or reading this blog! Since you’ve been called, this means that God plans to use you to do work that will glorify Him. This is why we were created! Not to have the things this world glorifies (riches, pride, self-pleasure), but to expand the Kingdom of God! Being single is the perfect time to discover your gifts and purpose for your life.
God is all about purpose. He will send a husband that will HELP you achieve your purpose, so let’s never forget to pursue Him, above all. ❤